Life

YOOHOO. 

i almost forgot the password to my blogger =X 

that shows how long i havent been onto blogger!!

heh. just wanted to come and rant a little just 2 days before PS exam. i hope i'll do well for wed jury though! preettty much scared for excerpts.

I was just reminiscing about the past, and like wondering how my pri, sec and ballet friends were doing. Blog hopping and all, and to realized many of them changed quite a bit. 

So, what's happening in my life now?

i'm kinda in my own world now, practising, going for lessons, staying at home, going for appts.. 

and what's happening to my good friends? 

i have no idea. =X they dont contact me, i dont contact them lor =/

im kinda in my own world, trying to upgrade myself in every means and ways. oh. and to earn $$ as well! 

recently, ive been listening to a lot of stories. not just plain boring stories. but stories where you can learn the true meaning of why and what it actually means.

i can rmb every single story he said except the donkey one where he said it on the night i cried. forgot what it was all about but, nvm. 

past few weeks was hectic, after exams... there's other things to.... focus on. hmm. =/ 

actually, i've got nothing to complain at all since my life is so peaceful (:

except that .. to my friends: stop being so skeptical and think for yourself + family.

I WANT TO CRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY =(

friends?
im scared.
i dont even wanna tell anybody anything now.
i dont trust.



linda shall finally live in her own world of horn, piano
and shall keep like a super 1422098423x distance from everyone else.
anti social? so be it..


i miss you. i really do.
your the first one i would thought i would msg despite all the things you did to me last time.
sigh.
thanks for talking to me.


thank god there are pple who would listen to both sides of story, and making their own conclusions.



sigh.
from this stupid dumb shit incident, ive lost another someone, whom is so dear to me.
i feel stupid, doing so many things in the past for you.


take care.
bye.

trust?

after 6 years of being your xiaomei.
you're finally gonna say you dont trust me.
how wonderful.


ive got enough nonsense of yours.

hehehe.

im pretty happy tonight cause i've got funny videos and scary videos to keep me entertained.
and
with the planning of outing with yen and the RPGS girls.. totally eggcited. (:
i know i havent blogged for 3 weeks..
But that's because.. i've been relatively much happier (: like, totally.


i dont know how school would be like without the Year 3's after this sem.. they are seriously one fun batch..hahaha..


im pretty shocked that Tan Ji Ken actually pops by my blog to read.. hahaha. HI CHICKEN! (:
but that goes to show the weak pathetic side of me to him. =(



school's been only TWO days for me.
and i am already feeling tired..
yes..
everybody in school around is coughing as if they've got some throat cancer or something =.=
anyway. most importantly is.. ive been having fun with my horn everyday.
notice the word.. EVERYDAY?

yes. to a particular someone.. i dont think ill give up horn at all.. because yes ive worked hard to get this baby, and laoshi has put in a lot of effort to teach me. dont wanna waste his efforts and my parents duh. and obviously. myself too. (:


Well.. it's getting rather late already.
and i must say.
ALL GUYS ARE STILL THE SAME. except for SOME. (:

2010's gonna be a good year because it started well at the floating platform! (:
and i believe.. my life has been great so far till now. <3

it was wrong to begin with. =(


was reading my post dated 24th nov '09
i guess.
i cannot be more than looking forward to a wonderful december '09.

every since the breakup....
nothing has gone well for me...

there's really nothing much to look forward to now, except to practising horn and like catching up with old friends...

just like ytd, i attended whitley's band bbq chalet. it was awesome to see all the kids happy around me.. and they were all very friendly and i find them innocent..=) it was good to be around them because you know, what they are showing are the true side of them..

coincidentally.. beside P06-costa sands(pasir ris) was the batch below me of atheletic boys from commonwealth..

and just opposite was Luther's chalet with his RP mates.
it was good, to catch up with luther. he offered to drive my friends and i to pasir ris mrt.
A rough ragged boy, to now, a gentleman. wonderful. i wonder what major incident happened in his life that he became such a gentleman >.<





i suddenly got reminded of him....

like christmas.. it was supposed to be a nicely planned festive season.. but, now.. i guess. it will not happen...
newyear.. was looking so much forward to countdown with you for the first time ever.. but, now.. even as friends.. i dont think so you would want to..
thats how sad my life is.

but, on a happier note..
i've learnt to be like you.
you've always taught me to be mature,
to look at things at the middle.
like a coin.


look who's the one not being friend, my dear.
its you.
i still feel upset over that matter.
i hope time will heal all wounds.


you made me think so much before we got tgt..
when we got tgt i felt everything was fine and all.
after we broke up.. you made me think much more......


but you know what?
i really still enjoy making music with the same bunch of you guys.
tt includes zq, ben, ed.
yea. really do enjoy...
i miss those times,
we could sit around a table, drinking. and talking non stop .
and even playing games..
those were, really the happiest days of my life with you all.



i miss the happy times.

How I feel

wish

I wish the person I love the most could just read my mind.

how i wished.

I wish I could turn back time. Back to the days when I will wake up and see a text message from him. Back to the days, when he'd call me in the middle of the night and end up talking up until sunrise. Back to the days when he repeats my name then tell me how much he loves me.

i tell you,
LINDA IS IN A SUPER DUPER FRIGGING BAD MOOD NOW.
let me tell you her story, and you will feel the same for her.
i think you all should pity her.



she had hfmd, which was a rather mild one like on monday after teaching a certain particular primary school. THANKS SO MUCH.
thought she would be cured in 2 days, she didnt tell anyone she was sick. (Y) wonderful.


she only realized that she got hfmd on wed, and the doctor confirmed it.
she hurried to text the boss about her condition and told him to find a replacement quick to perform.
-hurrah, a replacement has been found-


she hurried to tell another guy about the condition.
saying she cannot perform, but she will still be attending the function.
-guy tells her its okay, take a rest and stay at home-
she told him if she's fine by then, she'll be joining them for all the fun
-guy says okok, drink more water and rest well-


a day before
-hey, i'm fine alr, ill be going for .... blablablablablabla....-
5 MINS LATER
*calls me*
-errr. sorry, but really sorry. we thought you werent coming already.. so.. we gave up your seat at the dinner table to someone else.. uh. so we thought we would treat you and the group of friends another day for thanking you guys..-
HUR.
friends forever, really. thanks.
its okay not to have the extra dinner.
really.
bless you couple though.
im pissed with YOU, at how YOU do things.



is it me,
or im really just being unlucky these 2 weeks.
breakup,
all the nonsensical stuff of no communication during rehearsals.
sick
hfmd
replacement of players
and now this has to happen.

WONDERFUL.


Linda,
smile, because it happened.
=)

after all the unlucky ones, will come the good ones, darling.=D


its quite sad.




its okay i guess since ive got really other good friends around.
and i guess i need to re focus some areas of my life once again..

i'll prolly go mahjong/movie/shopping/chill out at idk where...
BLAH.
whatever!

(:

I WANNA BE YOUR FAVOURITE HELLO (:

and HARDEST GOODBYE =)

spell u-n-l-u-c-k-y

unlucky or lady luck on his side that he doesnt want me to be in the quartet?


feel like shit maximum now you know.
argh.
PIECE OF SHIT.

i swear it must be the damn Eb horn instrument i used at the damn pri school. freak.


why am i so damn weak.
i wanna get well ASAP

4th dec.

4th dec. i feel so ..................
its supposedly one month.
i wouldnt say im depressed.
but ive been surpressing too many things in my heart already.

sooner or later ill just really break down.


anyways,
i thank God ive got really good friends
all i had to ask was.
"shihhan, you later free?"
and then i had something to do already.

wonderful
he treated me to u.d.d.e.r.s ice cream which i felt was awesome because it was really sweet and i enjoyed eating while walking and talking to him. Catching up with him on the old times, and how he's doing in school now.. really nice..
its been long since ive had such feelings.
blessed and all.



but when im alone,
im back to the quiet, moody me.
which i feel like shit,
because of this shit.
because ive trusted you whole heartedly, hence im feeling the pain now..





dearest,

i believed you could give me a good life, you would treat me like a jewel, like a gem, you could change my life with the little things you do. Spend quality time with me during festive occasions and not only when im down and out. but, i guess im wrong after all these had happened. i'm not sad about all these anymore, and all the breakup and hoo-haa. im just u-p-s-e-t with the way you treat me now. im sure id be able to find a much nicer guy than you.

love you with all my heart,
i hope we can still be good friends.
linda.

love

"If a kiss were a raindrop, I’d send you showers. If hugs were a second, I’d send you hours. If smiles were water, I’d send you the sea. If love was a person, I’d send you me."

HURT

why arent you trying knowing that im making the effort to break the barrier already?
hurt.
really hurt by your actions and not by us breaking up.



time?
how much time do you need?



is it that difficult to be friends once again?
you're making me feel worst you know.



.
.
.

the big round moon.

while everybody is enjoying themselves....




im here being so upset.
never felt like this in my whole life.





and the only reason i feel like this
is because ive fallen deeply in love with you.

but i'm prepared to put all that aside and just be friends for now.
but you're not being friend towards me.
hence the hurt.
=(





the moon is really bright tonight.
its really nice with the breeze and just by looking at the moon,
its really pretty and i feel kinda relaxed.

uoh ssiw I
please read the upside down.

spell u-p-s-e-t

you really made me very upset this time round.
i know you dont want to go home with me.
till the extend you had to say you were gonna take bus back.
i'm seriously hurt.




i think im just plain dumb.
and i look like a total complete retarded crying on the train.




i bet you didnt care at all.


friends?
ya sure,
you were the one who said we should be friends for now.
who's the one being not friend at all.
i feel so ...............
its like, i gave my all and tried my very best to be cheerful and smiley during rehearsal and all already.
i told myself never to cry for you, but you just had to come up with such an excuse. and, it really did hurt me.


ive never felt so hurt in my whole entire life before besides grandma leaving us.
i guess this christmas and new year is nothing new to me anymore.
i was still looking forward to spend all these wonderful festive occasions with you.
but i think that its not possible even as friends.
since you dont even want to speak to me nor talk to me.





besides me being sad and all....
i think my sis is in love, cos recently she's been receiving many many gifts.
i hope that guy isnt like you, being a total jerk.
i hope he's really a nice guy to my sis.
and not like a total complete jerk.

happy?

happy 21st my dear cousin =D

HELLO GRANDPA!

hello world.

today's been a good day

i havent been thinking about anything till i came home,

turned on my com. and i saw my desktop pic.

sigh.

i thought i'd be strong over this..

but..

=(

sigh.

why are guys like that?

jerks.

i really miss you,

i really do..

i really really miss you.

yea...

love

"But sometimes, no matter how much you love someone, they just can’t love you back in the same way. Believe me. Living with someone who can’t love you back …is way lonelier than being alone."

-grey's anatomy

"I love you” means that I accept you for the person that you are, and that I do not wish to change you into someone else. It means that I will love you and stand by you even through the worst of times. It means loving you even when you’re in a bad mood, or too tired to do the things I want to do. It means loving you when you’re down, not just when you’re fun to be with. “I love you” means that I know your deepest secrets and do not judge you for them, asking in return that you do not judge me for mine. It means that I care enough to fight for what we have and that I love you enough not to let go. It means thinking of you, dreaming of you, wanting and needing you constantly, and hoping you feel the same way for me.

Man:God, why did you make women so beautiful?
God:So you would love her.
Man:But God, why did you make her so dumb?

God:So she would love you.

what is love?

love cannot be defined by age, looks, race, religion isnt it?

Life is not easy. the harder you love, the harder you fall.

really do love you.

tired

fear

shattered,

idk

i dont know why are you acting like this.

i dont dare to talk to you for fear i might say the wrong things.

but you dont even want to take a look at me.

even the tone you use to teach me now. its different.

different.

why are you like that?

i really miss the times we were together holding hands, laughing and talking about our future.

i dont know why

the first thing when i saw you coming in the room, i wanted to run towards you and hug you.

but the look on your face tells me, no. -stay-away-.

i feel so scared.

crying doesnt help in anyway.

its like glass shattering and never will be able to get mended.

i really want things to be like how things were as before.

happy for now.

Twins birthday was awesome!

HAPPY 18TH SWEETIESSSS =D

we all love youuuuuuu boooooothhh =))

i hope you had a awesome 18th darlings!

i love youuuuuuu both :)

Hello missy tan!

hello mirror =D
ahhhhh. love love l-o-v-e you people!

<3333

AC BAND BBQ!

hi! =D

it was hmmmm. fun ah..

but i didnt manage to take many many photos. =(

oh wellszxzxz.

its been 2 days.. =(

ilummdd.

=(

i want to smile like i did in secondary school days .

haisssss.
i feel so bored =(


there are SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO many things i want to do .. =(
not in order though.
1) Sentosa
2) badminton
3) bball
4) shopping for new clothes
5) swimming
6) party with my friends
7) meet up with friends to chill
8) Moviesss marathon
9) night cycling
10)chalet
11)stayover at friends' place
12) BBQ
13) picnic
14) travelling around to eat good food
15) go ikea to window shop and eat hotdog
16)buy gifts! where's the moneyyyy! =(
18) science centre
19) botanic gdns!
20) night safari
21) make breakfast with dearest <3
22) chill with my baby (:

i love my darling (:
he's playing mahjong and ignoring me again =(


can $$$$$ drop down from the sky or something pleaseeeee?=(



OH OH OH .
AND
I CANT WAIT FOR
TWINS BIG 18TH THIS FRI (: , stayover & chill1!! (:
and and and
LILING'S WEDDING
plusplusplus
JEREMYLIM AND LYNETTE WEDDING!! (the wedding horn quartet)
OH PLUS PLUS PLUS
SHIHHAN'S BIG 18th on 25th!!
ANDDDDDDDDD CHRISTMAS + NEWYR!!!! omg
so egggggciting (:
teeeheee. but that's all only gonna happen in dec =(
can time hurry pass please? r4



i cant wait for christmas,
knowing you've got something in mind to do for me (:
but i dont know what to do ..
maybe i should start thinking .. =)

(:

i must be crazy to be mad about every single thing last night. =(




linda is really really a blessed girl (:
she's loved by everyone <3
she has a happy family :D
many many many good friends (:


i love you baby! =D
thank you for loving me with all your heart too <3

teeheee. speak of the devil.
play mj must win more $$ okay =D

Linda is feeling sick,
she didnt go to school tonight to practice horn.
in fact, she wasted one whole day =(
haissss.
ellise came over and we talk cock a bit.
hahahahhaas. (:
i love her!

-g-u-y-s- no, i mean, jerks.

"all guys are the same,
i just havent met the perfect one,
once you've jio-ed her, you push her aside."
-from jo's blog.




well. i must say that its kinda true.
its been 5 days.
i know exams are important.
but are they so important that you dont reply my texts?
the problem is i dont even know about your whereabouts/how you're doing.
yet my bestest knows everything.
i dont even get an offline message from you;
how sad is that.
its like totally no communication between us.


though i know you love me deep from the bottom of your heart,
how sweet and all..
but you should at least talk to me, or let me know how you are?
i dont wanna make a big fuss and all about this thing cause i know exams are very important to you.
you may be thinking why i didnt bother calling you
thats cause i wanted you to concentrate and focus on your exams, knowing you cant multitask.








i want to shout out:
ARE YOU STUPID OR JUST PLAIN DUMB?!?!?!?
MY BROTHER IS SUCH A PAIN IN AN ASS. HE THINKS HE'S TOO GOOD OR SMTH.
HE JUST LOST SUCH A BEAUTIFUL GIRLFRIEND.
GUYS WHO CHEATS ON GIRLS SHOULD JUST GO AND DIE. THANKS.


you think you're so frigging smart?
please get out of the house,
i want to see how you're gonna survive on your own, idiot.
cheryl is such a nice and thoughtful girl,
you are such a jerk, you dont deserve her you idiot.
got another girl outside?
hur. i bet she cant last. you HOPELESS FREAK.




you know whats the saddest thing? oh wait. maybe im not that sad afterall.
i dont even know whats in my memory for such a sibling.
so useless and hopeless.
cant even do anything to save his own ass.






no more kiki,
no more random talks
no more make up
=(

i missssssss you=(
its been 2 days;
oh well
i hope your exams go well =)


school's out for the first semester! YOOOHOO. its party + prac on my own time!!
well. laoshi just called while i was napping.
PS tmr @ yst!
hmmmm.
i hope im prepared for his lesson. =X


The weathers' been ~~~~
its freezing me.. and i wished i could just hug you.
im like so afraid that i'll fall sick and all=(


it was so good to see my juniors and fellow alumnis again =D
i love amandeeee <333
i love jessica <333
i love the horns <333

RECENTLY.....

i love you <3

sad.

sometimes..
i feel that when you talk to others..
you're happier.


in short,
you're happier without me.



i dont know why i feel this way,
maybe its because the way you talk to me,
and to others.




sorry for everything,
perhaps you'll never ever see all these,
but i must still say i love you.
for being such a wonderful capable person
whom everyone needs.


whats so nice quarrelling over such stuff?
it just makes everybody feel like shit.



what left me heartbroken and sad was when you said you might leave.


Horoscope from the facebook:

"Your Love Horoscope
Recovery is the name of the love game today, Libra. If you have been working on some painful issues, you can expect these to blow over by the day's end. If you are attached, you may even find someone seeking forgiveness for a grudge that you have been holding in. Single? Do not be surprised if someone from your past makes an appearance and is looking to re-connect. Do not jump to conclusions here, it is possible for people to change and this may well be just the transformation you have been looking for. A bumpy ride is expected today, but you will find yourself smiling by days end."


true enough, it was a bumpy ride. and hopefully everything will be fine.



good night sweets.
xoxo

Linda is feeling blessed. =)
gees.


PS exam on monday, hehhe.
i hope everything goes alright! =D


i've prolly been too tired from all the -not-enough-sleep- thing,
and i cant focus on playing horn.
thatsssssss .. BAD.


ANWs.
conCORdis quartet performing on 18.11.09 @ band world !
=D







i love you =D heheh.
gambatteeeeeeeee for everything =)

to love or to hate.

"Someday, someone is going to walk into your life and make you realize why it never worked out with anyone else."

saw this in someone's blog
i think it really makes a lot of sense, and makes me think a lot right nao.

i dont know if he's the one.....
he's awesome for nao.
the one who knows what i like/dislike,
knows when im sad
knows how to take the initiative.
knows how to teach me stuff
the one who loves me.

what would actually have happened if i already said yes on that day?
would all these thoughts have come into his mind?
i considered every single thing carefully, ......................

nevermind. i love you still.=)

SIGH.

okay, my first wind band concert is over.

it was okay i hope?

but everyone was feeling really listless. =(

sucks.

i dont like to emo

i dont like to see people emo either.

.

.

.

.

took a lot a lot of photos today,

but im toooooo tired to upload everything.

=)

shall upload another day!

.

.

.

.

school's been good so far i guess..

.

.

.

ANYWAY!!

LAOSHI IS BACK IN SG!

that means.... PS ! =X

haah. kinda looking forward but on the other hand,

maybe not..

.

.

.

.

.

10/10

i dont know what i want=(

aiya.

anyway.

i was just having random thoughts

how many of your secondary school friends can you still be soooo close to?

some are just half hearted people.

sigh.

.

.

.

dont think ill be celebrating.

every year is..

just the same.

.

.

WOW.

at last blogger can upload photos. =D

I MISS A LOT OF PEOPLE! =(

school is crazy.

No matter how hard you practice, you must open up your ears bigbig;

hais.

so emo today.

i hope everything goes well for you ! =(

if not i'll feel super super guilty =(

haiiss.

i miss everybody =(

Birthday

teeheeehee.
it was a good night ytd =D
joelle's party was fun, but maybe not to all though =X

i certainly had fun,
catching up with chelsy.
I think out of all my primary school friends, she's the one i see the most often alr =X

was really tiring ytd..
but i was glad joelle was happy and stuff.

well.
jo asked me to blog about the things i want for my birthday..
i havent really thought about it=S
oh wells.

life's been so-so recently..
so sleepy =X

ill update when blogger allows me to post photos again =)
tata!

HIYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
so now what?
there isnt any fonts blablabla in my blogpost.
i just feel like blogging!
hahahaha

My sis was so cute. i miss her!

teeeheeeheee. school's good so far i guess.
will update soon!=)

Linda is feeling bored right now

She's at TCC @ campus 1.

She just drank hot milk which costs 5 bucks.

but in this TCC, there's 15% off for all nafa students!

but does it really help?

.

.

.

i back on blogger! =D

.

.

.

She's having fever, cough and headache.

cough is the worst man

there's performance class tomorrow!!!

.

.

She's started school for a week and a day.

and now, she's sick. wonderfully awesome!

wtv!

.

.

.

.

Good: horn techniques building up again

laoshi is (Y) good!

=D

Bad: there's so much homework. i dont know how to do.

it's the research part which is difficult =(

how?

.

.

.

anw; my life's been ~~~~ cause there isnt much happenings.

.

.

LONG OVERDUED PICS!

but, it isnt the soft copy.

i took photo of the hard copy!

cos dearest max hasnt sent us any pics!

LENGKIAT!

SHENGLONG.
MAOMAO!

JIANHAO!!

is evil. cause he and han eat durian then come and talk to me

I TOTALLAYE DONT LIKE DURIANS.=(

FEDERICK ONG!


MOMMA LILING.

i like this pic! very nice!

HAN!

PAPA MAX

and lastly, the cutezxzxzxzxzxz couple. =D



that was my saturday!=D

BLOGGER IS SO BAD.

MY PHOTOS COULDNT BE UPLOADED.

I GIVE UP BLOGGING TONIGHT.